Thursday, November 28, 2013

Happy Thanksgiving

This blog makes me think, express myself, and work out what's inside my head to give me the ability to do my best, take care of my Mom, my kids and me.  I feel much better today.  I made an apple pie with the kids, and I'm looking forward to giving my Mom a kiss today. Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

The Past feasting with the Present

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and I'm feeling guilty about spending another buffet dinner at the old folks home.  Thanksgiving is the time we all have memories based around home. Perhaps it's what our Aunt made, the special china used, leftovers, or the first time we sat at the adult table.  Whatever they may be, this is the holiday where the past feasts with the present.  Actually the whole darn thing is based on remembering that very first Thanksgiving meal. My memories of Thanksgiving are sweet and I especially remember my Mom (Peggy) rolling up the extra pie crust with cinnamon and sugar and letting me eat it right out of the oven, before dinner.

Suddenly I'm thinking, what about Thanksgiving are my girls going to remember?  Every year I am more focused on spending it with Peggy, trying to make it special for her even knowing she will not remember any of it. Instead of creating lovely, sweet memories for Sunny and Gidget, like my Mom did for me.   I know the importance and value of caring for family will be and is a very important part of our family traditions and memories. My brother is coming with his kids and it's going to be a good day, and we will make it fun, the kids will play, we'll be stuffed and the Packer game is on.

But, honestly I just want to make a pie at home with my daughters and roll up the extra dough with tons of cinnamon and sugar and show them that I care about their memories as much as I do about Peggy's.

I Believe

Here is an amazing video of Peggy hearing Sunny's new song she wrote for Reflections this year.  It's called I Believe, and it's an inspiring upbeat song that is so sweet that it cuts right through Alzheimer's and smashes it to the core.  You don't have to watch the whole thing, as I know it's kind of scary to see someone in the end stages of this rotten disease, but when you see how Peggy comes alive as she hears her granddaughters voice, you'll understand why I wanted to show it to you.

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

NBC LA Connections and us

Before it aired I was nervous.  I knew they were going to put in the part when I said "jealous".  Thankfully it came across compassionately.  As you know from this blog, we all love Peggy so much and just simply want her at peace now.  It's not that I don't want this job anymore, it's that I want her to not be upset, or in pain, or for goodness sake, I don't want her to have to choke on her own saliva or food because her throat doesn't know what to do anymore.

 NBC LA Life Connected Video

So many people from near and far have personally taken the time to reach out and spread love and light, friendship, tears and strength.  It feels good, I don't feel nervous anymore, just a little raw.  Thank you for understanding and letting me share our story.  I sincerely hope none of you have this happen to you or anyone you love.

And for what it's worth, Gidget keeps making fun of my sincerity on screen.  I love her, she continues to make us laugh through all kind of sorrow.